July 16, 2018
Fork on the Road:
Abundance or Poverty by Choice?
Location: Bangkok, Thailand
Nomadic Existence as a Renunciate
I had been hovering above the poverty line by choice since I came back to the Philippines in 2004. I left the corporate world, even chose to become homeless the past 6 years, and have lived life on the open road of Asia not knowing where the next money comes from. This nomadic existence as a renunciate (spiritual seeker who renounces material wealth and lives life as a minimalist) has taken me to the proverbial waterfalls, allowed me to meet magnificent lives and put me in the right place at the right time where I needed to be - it's like having an unseen hand blazing a path for me. I have long maintained that there is a thin line slightly above the poverty level where this magic happens - and I make a conscious effort to stay within that thin line...until now.
Nerves of Steal
This is by far not an easy life - certainly not for everyone. I could be in a new country, not knowing anyone, not familiar with the place, language, culture or its people, or the God they worship, no place to stay yet, and I only have a few dollars in my pocket - just enough for a few days. This can be nerve-racking for most people if it ever happens to them. But imagine this being an occasional norm rather than the exception - this has been my life for over a decade now. It has been exciting to say the least - a white-knuckle roller coaster ride with no safety net underneath.
A Benevolent Universe
The abundance may or may not be there, but I've never skipped a meal and I've never slept on the sidewalk (well, once I did, but it was my choice). I am fully assured by my benevolent universe that the power of the Big Bang is behind me. It has proven true time and time again, consistently without fail - it will never let me starve at the very least. If living on my wits is wrong, I would have died on a sidewalk a long time ago. But I am well, healthy, vibrant and on top of my game. That is my validation.
Even though I have that assurance, I still have to do my due-diligence to make the magic happen. Or at least make the due-effort. And I always do - I'm not complaining about that. I've knocked on doors, pounded the pavement, sent out marketing pitches, pursued leads, talked to establishment owners, etc. So, what's the problem?
Still, I am human. I cannot help it if my mind races at light speed 24/7...and it doesn't stop looking for ways to pull me out of my financial predicament. It is exhausting! I am already tired. Even during my stay in India a month ago, my mind was already racing due to diminishing cash flow - and it hasn't stopped as I write this. What's it like? It's like a deer being chased by a lion for a month without stop! My mind is working overdrive. I can't make it stop even though I know my universe is always behind me and would never allow anything bad to happen to me. I'm exhausted.
Marginal gains have happened along the way. This already tells me I haven't been abandoned by my universe. But it's just enough for my very immediate needs.
So it's not so bad - I haven't starved nor slept on the sidewalk yet. But my cash is still precariously low and my racing mind is heating up. This is the harshest prank my universe has pulled over me...pushing me all the way to the brink. This is seriously taxing my sanity as my mind would not stop racing.
Now on the edge of my seat, I am seriously exhausted. I have to do something I thought I would never do - make a choice: RED PILL or BLUE PILL.
RED PILL or BLUE PILL?
If you've seen the MATRIX MOVIE, red pill means you take the chance and jump into the unknown and blue pill means you stay where you are. In all these years, I have always been given that choice:
- BLUE PILL - continue my life as a renunciate not knowing when or where I make my next money but I stay on the thin line
The choice has always been mine. And I am supremely confident my universe will provide what I ask. Everything I asked for in life has already been given to me. There is no doubt in my mind that whichever way I choose, the choice will be realized. And I have always chosen the life of a renunciate - surviving on my wits and staying on that thin line where magic happens. After all, I still live a very privileged life to be traveling this much, meeting magnificent lives with practically loose change in my pocket. How many rich people can wake up and do exactly what excites them at the moment? How many of them can enjoy the freedom to do what they want to do, go where they want to go and be what they want to be? Not too many.
RED PILL: Abundance
On this occasion however, after a lot of deliberation, feeling exhausted and worn-out, I finally decided to take the RED PILL. I can now be ok with it. Whatever purpose being a renunciate serves, has already been served - whether I see it or not. There is nothing left to prove by not knowing when or where the next meal comes from. So calmly, with an equanimous mind, I allowed my universe to bring on the abundance...as much as it wants...and I will no longer offer resistance. I welcome abundance now with open arms. Let it come...let the deluge come...let it come now.
How does this change the way I do things? Will I work harder? No. I can't work any harder than what I'm doing already. Will I work differently? No. I am already optimized into whatever I am doing.
The only thing that changes is the INTENTION. Intention changes everything. Intention changes how things are done behind the scenes and consequently changes the outcome.
Whereas before, I would work as hard as I can with the intention that I get as little as I can to stay on the thin line. Now, given this change, I will still work as hard as I can but with the intention of receiving as much abundance coming my way with full gratitude. That's it. Just the intention - and all is coming. This is the kind of relationship I have with my universe - hard to comprehend, I know. But that's how it works for me.
Already after taking such a life-changing direction, changes started happening.
- After years of not talking to my Dad, I just reached out to him. I just learned that his close friend, Tony Halili (whom I affectionately call Tito Pidot), the mayor of Tanauan, Batangas, was shot dead by a sniper last July 2 - it was even caught on video. He must be devastated. They had been close buddies through thick and thin from my earliest memories as a kid. I'm not sure if this has anything to do with my chosen abundance but the timing is uncanny. Perhaps healing needs to happen first before abundance takes place.
Somehow, at the back of my mind, I speculate that my universe has been wanting me to take the RED PILL for a long time since. What I had been calling a prank by my universe may not be a prank but a strong message to change direction already. I've just been stubborn, too attached to my romanticized notion of life on the edge.
This also brings to mind what an Ananda Marga Dada (a monk) saw on my palms many years ago. It didn't make sense to me then, but he said I will come upon abundance...not just abundance but extreme abundance. I rejected the notion then. Now I welcome it. Abundance gives me leverage to do all the positive things I had been wanting to do - realize my CubbyHole, establish a Vipassana Center, and be an instrument of good from a position of power and strength.
This starts a new chapter in my life. Perhaps all these years of life on the open road was a preparation for this new mandate.
(Jul 23, 2018) Take care stay true to yourself no matter how the journey goes. The true abundance is within you. Not outside. Have a good journey and see you again when our path cross
(Jul 21, 2018) I hope you're all right my friend. I read your blog with great interest and astonishment. I am wondering how you will realise the material abundance which you already have in full potential inside
(Jul 21, 2018) Manifesting is a funny and weird thing as you have just experienced. To answer your question, I don't have any plan on how this abundance is realized - it's not for me to architecture. All I have to do is put the intention. Everything else happens behind the scenes (so I have no clue whatsoever how this abundance will manifest). As Einstein acknowledged in the end, 'there is a consciousness manifest in the universe that is greater than that of man'. I have already experienced this consciousness and have no doubt whatsoever of its existence.
(Jul 21, 2018) Well, I am looking forward to reading about this abundance phase. Interesting how you would treat it. Describe in detail when it happens. Most people get rich to travel, among other pursuits. But you, you are already traveling, so you are already rich! Everything else is icing. He-he, anyway, I will know if you become rich someday but maybe you set a very high bar to attain.
(Jul 21, 2018) There is no benchmark. I just set the intention that I'm open to abundance...intention is enough. If abundance is in the cards, then my openness will make it happen. If not in the cards, no amount of intention can make it happen.
(Jul 19, 2018) We choose the path we walk on, we are the creators of our OWN world perception of the mind. What the mind thinks, the universe provides.
(Jul 19, 2018) Love the narrative and the zing by which it was written. And I totally agree -- intention is the driver of all our experiences. Whether it's the red pill or the blue pill what counts is intention - - preferably and ideally the harmonious alignment with the intentions of our soul. May you continue to walk in the sunshine brother. 🙂
(Jul 19, 2018) Good one Gigit! As if you heard my thoughts few days back 🙂 We are all connected after all. Thank you man ❤ 🙏
(Jul 19, 2018) How wonderful this is
(Jul 17, 2018) I've really loved this text! And in your case, neither option is the blue pill. The blue pill stands for conformism, accepting things as they are, accepting to be a cog in the system and complaining that "life is a bitch", or not even looking at reality. That's far from what you've been doing over the past 10 years. You've been living with a finger on the pulse of Life, nothing more red pill than that 🙂 And your current choice to seek a constant stream of abundance is not a blue pill either, you're not choosing to renounce your experiences as "silly" or "immature", and you're making a conscious choice towards progress, not in the vibes of "the dream is over". I'm looking forward to seeing what comes next for you, my friend 🙂
(Jul 17, 2018) Blessings and metta on your new path, Gigit!
(Jul 17, 2018) Everything in its own perfect time, G 🙂. Much love and good vibes to you!
(Jul 17, 2018) You are an inspiration, a great teller of stories, your experiences and journeys are wonderful and.... you speak so frankly. Which is always best. There are many reasons as to why and how you've come this far. Your energy and will to keep on, along your charming personality speaks volumes... As long as you continue to share I will always be there with you... Much love and support 🙂❤🙂
(Jul 17, 2018) Wishing you exuberance in whatever you do, friend
(Jul 17, 2018) your abundance IS your life Gigit. Glad to hear you found a taker for your bits. Taking care of yourself will ultimately help others.
(Jul 17, 2018) Gigit I admire you. Safe journey always
Anna Katharina Kramer
(Jul 17, 2018) All the best to you! I have always admired your way of living and admire this concious decision too.
(Jul 17, 2018) Hoping for your continued health and equanimity.
(Jul 17, 2018) All the best Git!
Next stop: Sunday Visit to Chatuchak Weekend Market
Bangkok Blogs by TheLoneRider
- Yoga Inversions at Now's Fitness Gym Sep 19, 2018
- Movie Review: Under Construction (2015) Sep 15, 2018
- Walking Tour of Little India Sep 15, 2018
- Vinyasa Yoga with Teacher That at Now's Fitness Sep 14, 2018
- Abs Workout with Teacher San at Now's Fitness Sep 13, 2018
- Vinyasa Yoga with Teacher That at Now's Fitness Sep 14, 2018
- Abs Workout with Teacher San at Now's Fitness Sep 13, 2018
- Exercise Ball Workout with Teacher Bie at Now's Fitness Sep 11, 2018
- Exploring the Amphawa Floating Market Sep 9, 2018
- Exploring the Tree-Engulfed Wat Bang Kung Temple Sep 9, 2018
- Parting of the Maeklong Railway Market with a Passing Train Sep 9, 2018
- Exploring Damnoen Saduak Floating Market Sep 9, 2018
- Horse Racing at the The Royal Bangkok Sports Club Sep 8, 2018
- Fight Class with Teacher San at Now's Fitness Sep 7, 2018
- Exploring the Bangkok Art Book Fair 2018 Sep 6, 2018
- Circuit Training with Mild at Now's Fitness Sep 5, 2018
- Gentle Flow Yoga with Nuch at Now's Fitness, Bangkok Sep 4, 2018
- A Yogi Lost in a Modern Gym - Now's Fitness Sep 3, 2018
- Abundance at On Nut, Bangkok Aug 30-Sep 1, 2018
- Outside Looking In Aug 29, 2018
- Back in Bangkok After 5 Weeks Aug 27, 2018
- 15 Days in Bangkok July 10-24, 2018
- Peoplescape: Bangkok July 10-24, 2018
- Hatha and Yantra Yoga Fusion July 10-24, 2018
- Revisiting Terminal 21 Mall, Bangkok July 23, 2018
- Rope Skipping, 4mins Full-on July 22, 2018
- Sunday Visit to Chatuchak Weekend Market July 17, 2018
- Fork on the Road: Abundance or Poverty by Choice? July 16, 2018
- Loving Bangkok All Over Again Feb 22-26, 2016
- Hotel Review: Adventure Hostel Bangkok July 11, 2018
- Hotel Review: Riva Surya Bangkok Oct 20, 2014
- Exploring the Shopping Malls of Bangkok Oct 6-20, 2014
- Bangkok's Street Food Delight Oct 6-20, 2014
- Bangkok Revisited 3 Oct 6-20, 2014
- A First Timer in Bangkok December 31, 2005 - January 3, 2006
Now's Fitness Bangkok - gym equipment, yoga, Muay Thai, boxing, fitness trainer, cafe, healthy food
726 Soi On Nut 14 Rd, Khwaeng Suan Luang, Khet Suan Luang, Krung Thep Maha Nakhon 10250
Bangkok Cost Index
as of Sep 4, 2018: US$1 = Baht 32 = Php 53
- Bht 60 sm, 90 big one mug draft beer
- Bht 13 1.5 liter drinking water
- Bht 220 one hour massage
- Bht 60-80 muesli breakfast
- Bht 60-80 tom yum soup in modest eatery
- Bht 25-30 coffee
- Bht 30-50 pad thai
- Bht 350 Adventure Hostel lodging
- Bht 20-30/load laundry, coin operated machine
- Bht 7 bus ride
Transport Map of Bangkok
You can get around Bangkok using the trains, buses, tuk-tuks or the boat. Here is the transport map to give you a heads-up.
Bangkok to Chiang Mai by Night Train from Bang Sue Train Station
- take the MRT train to Bang Sue Station. Take the #2 Exit to the provincial trains
- Proceed to Counter 2. You will see an information booth, a train schedule chart and the ticket counter. Choose the train and pay at the ticket counter.
- daily train schedule:
- 8:48am - #7 Train, arrive Chiang Mai 7:30pm, not sleeper, B638
- 2:06pm - #109 Train, arrive Chiang Mai 4:05am, sleeper
- 6:31pm - #9 Premium Train, arrive Chiang Mai 7:15am, sleeper, B938 upper deck, B1038 lower deck
- 7:56pm - #13 Train, arrive Chiang Mai 8:40am, sleeper, B768 upper deck, B838 lower deck
- 10:22pm - #51 Train, arrive Chiang Mai 12:10pm, sleeper, 3rd class B270 (non sleeper), 2nd class B438, B728 upper deck, B798 lower deck
»» next story: Sunday Visit to Chatuchak Weekend Market
»» next Lucid Thoughts story: An Intimate Conversation with my Universe in Chiang Mai
»» back to Lucid Thoughts
»» back to Homepage
2000 | 2001 | 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | ALL BLOGS